St. Louis

I love the Arch. I’ve visited it twice, and both times I burst out laughing when I stood beneath it. I can’t help it – it’s so audacious it cracks me up. Everyone knows what it looks like; you can probably conjure up an image in your mind’s eye right now. But what you can’t appreciate until you stand beneath it is just how huge it is. It’s big enough to straddle nearly every building in the city! It tops out at over 600’. Plus it tapers as it goes up, which creates the illusion that it’s even taller when you stand under it and look straight up. Add to that the fact that it’s covered in shiny stainless steel (who doesn’t love shiny stuff?), and that it’s triangular. When all that finally registers in my brain it causes spontaneous laughter – like the kind you get when you think the fireworks just had their big finish and suddenly they get even bigger! Love it!

And if that isn’t crazy enough, there’s an entire museum, including two movie theaters, in the underground space beneath the monument. Plus you can ride these whacky train-roller coaster-elevator cars up to the top and look out. The whole thing is remarkable. I still smile when I think about it.

City Museum perfectly captures that joyful feeling and amplifies it. Imagine a museum designed by a 12 year-old boy. It has absolutely no purpose! No seriously – there are no information boxes, wall text, or other descriptions; they don’t even give you a map when you enter! You just start wandering around and exploring. If the City Museum has a Mission Statement it probably goes like this: Help people have fun and leave the education to the other museums!

So what would a 12 year-old boy come up with? Well, he’d probably gut the building and build a series of interconnected caves that cover three floors and wrap around the building’s roof-to-floor atrium, with dark halls, dead-ends, passages that you have to craw through, and slides connecting the levels. If he put in a fish tank it would have cool stuff like turtles and catfish.

The caves are just the start. The interior stairways have industrial rollers for banisters (picture the end of the x-ray machine at the airport – they used those rollers your bags slide down, but put them sideways to act as banisters). Each is painted in different crazy patterns and colors. As you go up or down you run your hands along the banisters and they all spin creating fun, wild patterns (yes I did this, several times!). On one floor there’s an indoor skate park. Another floor is full of beautiful architectural relics and salvaged pieces. The closest thing to a teaching moment I saw was a wall showing different decorations used on masonry and door knobs ("these knobs have a 4-part pattern, these have a 5-part pattern," etc). There’s a man refurbishing a pipe organ encircled by a toy train large enough for kids to ride .

Hidden away in corners on most floors are snack bars or coffee counters. If you look you’ll also find old couches or tables and chairs scattered around. Basically, Moms and Dads can sit down and watch the madness from a safe distance (if they aren’t climbing through the caves or going down the slides!). On one floor we found a huge thrift shop. Old tuxedo jackets? Check. Old band uniforms? Check. Wedding dresses? Check.

And that’s only the inside. The coolest feature of the City Museum is the tricked-out, over-caffeinated, death-defying jungle gym outside. Again, think about this from the perspective of a 12 year-old: it includes not one but two (!) old fighter jets, plus a fire truck! All three suspended between one and three stories above ground. There are also gazebos, old construction cranes, and other whacky urban detritus, most of which is suspended above ground and connected by bridges and paths constructed with re-bar and wire fencing. Where an adult would put stairs they installed sliding boards – some descending two or three stories. It’s nuts. And yes or course I was on that thing like stink on a dog! My thinking was if this thing wasn’t safe someone would have died and it would have been shut down by now (perhaps flawed logic but it worked for me). It was a blast!

There’s also some stuff on the roof of the building but we didn’t make it up there. However, I wouldn’t be surprised if it included a trampoline and bungie cords – it’s that kind of place.

So, yes, I climbed all over that thing like a monkey, and no, I was not the only adult doing it. I did see one Dad get stuck in a stairway – not because of his girth but because he was too long to get out at the top (there are few straight lines here – remember, think like a 12 year-old)! I even skinned my elbow on one of the slides! Yeah baby! Did I learn anything? Nope. Do I care? As if. If you go to St. Louis, go to the City Museum. If possible, go on a weekday so you won’t have to share it with too many kids!

After the City Museum we made our way to the Cathedral-Basilica of St. Louis for Noon Mass. The cornerstone was laid about 100 years ago and the building was consecrated in 1926. It’s a beautiful sanctuary covered from floor to ceiling (literally) with mosaics. They are extraordinary! They include the Bible scenes you would expect to see in a Basilica (Resurrection, Pentecost, etc) but also include local history like Native Americans and the early explorers in the west. The mosaic behind the main altar includes two deer! It’s a beautiful sanctuary and worth a visit when you’re in STL.

After Mass we went to Sweetie Pie’s for an awesome lunch. It took a month, but Paul has finally turned me into a lover of local cuisine. We drove across the country and back without eating at McD’s, BK, or the usual suspects. It sounded crazy at the start, but I now see the brilliance of the plan. It was awesome – we ate well, had fun, and met some cool people!